Category Archives: Bears behaving badly

An Embarrassment of Pandas

Ever since I learned that the collective noun for pandas is “an embarrassment of pandas” I have looked for an excuse to use it here. Of course I learned this on the internet, so, I am not entirely certain that this is correct, but since I couldn’t find anything else* I decided to go with this and hope for the best.

  • I did find the term “a cupboard of pandas”, but since this was in the entirely facetious book, 101 Facts About Pandas, which, among other “facts” classified pandas as a species of walnut, I decided that “cupboard” was probably not correct.

But no matter! One thing that we can be absolutely certain of, is that Pinky will embarrass her mother at any opportunity, especially in public in front of large numbers of people!

An Embarrassment of Panda (Mothers)

Never fear, Pinky has a cunning plan!

Never fear, Pinky has a cunning plan!

Bubba is getting entirely too comfortable with having an opinion that is not Pinky’s.

Be the Bear!
Bob T Panda

It’s Not a Party Unless There’s a Fight

Back in the real world, Pinky had a wonderful time at her birthday party, having her own cake all to herself. Bubba on the other hand, either decided it was too hot, got spooked by the huge crowd, or just decided it was time for a nap, and left his cake for his mom Mei Xiang to have her way with. Fortunately in the world of Panda Satire, the party has just begun!

So it’s one for brawl and brawl for one!

It's not a party till the pandas start a brawl!

It’s not a party till the pandas start a brawl! Fortunately, Bubba has his priorities in order.

And in other panda news, the Toronto Zoo, home of the almost one year old Canadian panda twins (known to the pandaratti as the TTwinkies) Now have a panda cam!!! The cam is only operational from 9 AM – 6:30 PM Toronto time, but it is a welcome addition to people who…um…really, really, REALLY need to watch panda cams for their…um…work. check it out here! (Not during working hours, of course!)

Panda Cam Follies

Panda Cam Follies

Late breaking news update!!!!!

An ultrasound from Zoo Atlanta conforms Lun Lun is carrying twins. I know, I know…it’s almost impossible to tell whether pandas are pregnant or not, but now there are pictures! We are not nearly out of the woods, so let’s all clasp our paws together and wish for a safe delivery and two healthy cubs. BTW, this will put Lun Lun on top of the panda production table for US pandas, as this will be number 6 and 7. (Bai Yun had 6 before she retired after the Wu Self was born; “when you have already produced perfection, why try for more?” said the modest young Wu)

More news when we have it!

Be the Bear,
Bob T Panda

Where Are The Real Pandas?

Well, it has been a little crazy busy around here, BUT, knowing it was going to get crazy busy, I got a little bit ahead on ‘toons for the weeks past. But of course, now my surplus is about to become a deficit. So I must ask: Where are the real pandas?

“If one more person asks….”

Oh those red pandas! They are such characters!

Oh those red pandas! They are such characters!

In other news, I have met (and hopefully recruited) a new young panda fan to the fold. If you are reading, Liam, welcome to the pandasphere! If there is anyone nicer to meet than a young reader, it is a young reader who loves pandas! Huzzah! Hope you didn’t drive your mom crazy on the way home quoting The Panda Chronicles Book 1: Your Brain on Pandas. That would make me feel terrible! (hee hee)

Keep being the bear! It’s almost Pinky’s (and Bubba’s) Birthday! Plans must be made! cakes must be frosted! Huzzah!

Bob T Panda

Phexit 1

Phexit – Brexit – what’s the difference? Well, at least at first glance, Brexit did not involve pandas, although……if Scotland proceeds with its intention to consider another vote for independence, England would have no easy access to pandas, as in the Scottish pandas in Edinburgh!!!!

Dis will not stand!

But…ahem…anyway, after setting up last week’s Friday post, I realized I had missed an opportunity to celebrate the Wu Self right on his actual birthday!!!!! Fortunately, according to the International Birthday Season codes and standards, today could STILL be considered Wu’s birthday season, (depending on how you interpret the rules) so along with today’s feature brand new ‘toon, allow me to rectify my grievous omission and add a few classic Wu-toons into today’s post.

Meanwhile, it is not enough that Pinky has pitched a hissy fit over the alleged slight from the Meihems, vis-a-vis their party invitation or lack thereof, but now, she has yet another sinister web with which she tries to ensnare Bubba. Has this panda no boundaries?

Pinky, do you really think that Bubba will fall for this?

Pinky, do you really think that Bubba will fall for this?

And while Bubba is beginning to be a little wary of Pinky’s plans (especially when they concern him or Banky Pig) he is impressed by her clever bending of the societal rules.

And now, for a rousing 4th Birthday tribute to the Wu Self!

"Howdy do! I'm Mr. Wu! Who are you?"

“Howdy do! I’m Mr. Wu! Who are you?” This was my first ‘toon starring Mr. Wu

"Wu calls his dance, 'Ode to a Weaf' "

“Wu calls his dance, ‘Ode to a Weaf’ “

An explorer's work is never done.

An explorer’s work is never done.

It is so hard for a small panda to prevail....

It is so hard for a small panda to prevail….

Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda

Scandal in the Panda House?

Uh oh…Bubba has been discovered spying on the back room deal making meeting between Pinky and the Meihems! Is this a political scandal in the making? What kind of deal is Pinky making with the Meihems? Is Bob going to be out on his fuzzy ears? And where IS Mittens?

Just what kind of deal is Pinky making?

Just what kind of deal is Pinky making?

I hope everyone had fun celebrating the Meihems’ birthday this weekend! Stay tuned, because Pinky and Bubba have a birthday coming up, not to mention some more political chicanery of some sort or another. And will we ever find out what happens to Mittens? Is he coming back? We hope not, but Pinky’s poofing is not always permanent. (Except as regards the Meihems and brother sister Po.)

I would settle for Secretary of Binky Bars.

Be the Bear
Bob T Panda

 

Double “O” Bubba: A Spy for All Seasons

Uh oh. Has Bubba gotten a little too big for his cubberalls? He should know better than to spy and tattle on his big sister. I mean, what kind of cabinet post can he expect in Pinky’s administration if he keeps this up?

And just what do the Meihems have in mind for Unka Bob in the Pink House?

Oh Bubba! What were you thinking?

Oh Bubba! What were you thinking? And now that Mr. Bun is back, don’t you think Pinky should treat him better?

I just want to give a shout out to all my new readers here at the Panda Chronicles! Helloooo Panda Fans!!! Last week was a tough one, out in the real world, and we have retreated to the world of pandas to catch our breath, before we go out there again and try to make the world a better place.  And if you need another dose of pandishness, check out Pinky’s Aunty Sandy’s video of her little brother being a pest here!

Don’t forget to tune in on Friday for the Meihems’ pandapalooza celebrating their third birthday on July 16th. (I believe they are getting their cakes on Friday, so if you want to watch that live, check on the Zoo Atlanta Panda Page!)

Be the Bear!
Don’t spy on Pinky!
Bob T Panda

Meanwhile, at the Panda House…

Did you see what happened at the last debate? I was out in the kitchen, checking to see if the cookie fairy had brought me some cookies during the night and I looked away from the television just at the crucial moment, and when I looked back, Mittens was gone! Poof! Just like that! And meanwhile, back at the Panda House… Mei was doing some fast thinking and making calculations on how she could keep her daughter out of hot water.

Last week over in the Twittersphere, some people were having fun with the names of Beatle’s songs and panda fan extraordinaire Anne Lane Witt came up with this one, which I…um…borrowed for this ‘toon:

What happens at the debate, states at the debate...

What happens at the debate, states at the debate…

I hope everyone is planning to have a safe and sane 4th of July, and NOT follow the example of the panda kindergarten, who are anything but sane.

uh. oh.

uh. oh.

I hope everyone is having a wonderful holiday weekend. Not that artists/writers/cartoonists get 3 day weekends. Oh no! But you all go and have a good time. Don’t give it a second thought. (But if you could send some cake my way, I would take back that pissy little rant. Really.)

Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda

And lest I forget our neighbors to the north, Happy Panada Day!!!!

Oh Panada, Oh Panada, how tasty are your maple leaves....

Oh Panada, Oh Panada, how tasty are your maple leaves….

 

Oh Where Has My Little Bun Gone?

Oh where, of where has my little bun gone, oh where, oh where can he be? The disappearance of Mr. Bun is such big news that it is the lead story on today’s episode of ZooNooZ! This has all the hallmarks of an international incident of crisis proportions! Will the Toronto Twinkies send Mr. Bun Home? Maybe, but not just yet, I don’t think.

Is that a ransom note I see?

Is that a ransom note I see?

And the demand is that Pinky be nice to Bubba????? Hmmm…this seems kind of suspicious if you ask me. I’m afraid there could be political concussions ahead!

And on a completely unrelated note, This video may replace pandas on a slide as my new favorite panda video! Just part of the Putting Pandas to work program! Nothing here to see…let’s move along, please.

Wednesday’s ‘toon will have more from the missing Mr. Bun controversy and then Mittens the Cat makes his reappearance next week. Be very afraid. This cat is not qualified to hold office!

Be the Bear

Bob T Panda

Hostages

Well! It seems that the recent International Incident has been resolved, but I suspect there may be more shenanigans yet to come! After all, this is not the first time Pinky has been involved in a hostage situation! Thanks to Vicky Vladic of VsomethingSpeaks, who reminded me of this, and thus gave me an idea for this Fabulous Furry Friday post. As you know, Friday is the day that we take a look back at panda satire past. Huzzah! We are hostages to the weekend!

Let’s revisit the scene of Pinky’s last indiscretion! (Okay, it’s not the last one…I’ve lost count of how many naughty things she has done, but it is the only time we know of when hostages were involved.)

Excuse me, Mr. Watterson, but....

Excuse me, Mr. Watterson, but….

I love a good art forgery, don't you?

“how does you spell ‘hostage’?”

Oh dear, the Mei-hem twinkies have made Pinky mad. Uh oh.

Oh dear, the Mei-hem twinkies have made Pinky mad. Uh oh.

He who laughs last, laughs...um...last.

He who laughs last, laughs…um…last.

We also had a recent techno-glitch, when I made a minor (I thought) change in how the blog landing page was set up. This little insignificant change somehow cancelled the email notification of posts for my subscribers. Oopsie. Being that my technical knowledge is extremely limited, and relies on naps, sugar laden snacks and pushing random buttons, it took a little bit before the problem sorted itself out. At least I think it did. I’ll let you know after my nap. If you missed last Friday’s post, here it is! It is ironic that the glitch happened on Friday the 13th, isn’t it?

Here is a ‘toon that demonstrates my vast technological knowledge:

Lamentations of Luddites lay waste to Linguini.

Lamentations of Luddites lay waste to Linguini….Call 1-800-U-R-LOSER

Be the Bear
Bob T Panda

I Am Not a Crook!

Oh the indignity of it all. To be accused in a note left in a panda’s playpen of all things, accused of unlawfully removing the adorable Canadian panda twins from their playpen and bringing them to MY house! I tell you,  I am NOT a crook! 

Hmmm…I think I’ve heard that phrase before but I can’t remember where.

Anyway, I know this is one of Pinky’s evil plans to discredit me, so that she can win the presidential race. No matter how badly she behaves, her numbers keep going up in the polls, while mine….um…don’t.

Really...I'm not!

Really…I’m not!

I can bearly bear (ha ha) to listen to the real election coverage anymore. It keeps getting more and more absurd and my pandy sense tells me that we are in for a long hot summer. We are going to need pandas and panda satire more than ever, so when you get tired of reality, be sure to come on by and check in with all the pandas here at the Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire.You’ll be glad you did.

I recently added a new item to the store at Pandyland! By request of a fan, We now have the Panda Kindergarten Samurai flask. good to quench your thirst in whatever way you think is necessary. I know what I’ll be putting in MY flask to get through the election season, but you can put what ever you’d like in it. Check it out here!

Be the Bear