Category Archives: Bob for President

But First, a Word From Reality

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We all love pandas. And we all love panda satire. (okay, I’m stretching the point a little, but just be patient with me.) So if you are here, and reading this blog, I think we can agree that we have at least one thing in common. Pandas.

But now, let’s have a word from reality…

I’m guessing that we all have differing opinions on some things and that’s okay. Every once in a while, I make someone mad because I put words in my pandas’ mouths that disagree with what the reader believes and that’s okay too.

Today, the Supreme Court agreed that any two people in this country can get married and that their marriage will be recognized throughout the country.  I think that’s marvelous. I myself have no intention of getting married, but that has been my right to get married or not for my whole life. I have friends and family who this has not been their good fortune, to have this as their decision to do or not. But now they have that right and I say huzzah!

The cynic in me says that as the years and decades go by, same sex couples will discover the rights of divorce, child custody and community property, but perhaps that’s as it should be. Why should heterosexual couples have all the fun?

The pandas  have nothing to say about this, at least not yet. The general atmosphere in the pandy kindy is one of celebrations. After all, it’s really hard to tell what sex pandas are, let alone whether they are the same sex or not.

This political season promises to be an even more acrimonious one than those that preceded it. I will do my best to only make fun of the things that people actually say and do, and so far it seems like this is going to be a bonanza year for satire. If I make something up, I will try to make sure that it is rooted in reality, and not just me saying something nasty about someone whose politics I disagree with.

Okay. enough of this serious crap. Let’s have fun with pandas! Vote Pinky 2016!

Vote for Pinky. Do YOU want to explain why you didn't?

Vote for Pinky. Do YOU want to explain why you didn’t?

Bring on the clown car!

Bring on the clown car!

BTW, you can show your support for Pinky by buying Vote  Pinky merchandise at my pandyland store. Huzzah!

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

 

Bob Finally Concedes the Election…

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We know, we know…the election has been over for months, but we were…um…busy, and besides, Babette de Panda insisted that the panda kindergarten be allowed to recount ALL the votes by..er..paw.  Needless to say, votes were eaten, tummies needed to be um..waited on for “evacuation,”  cuppycakes needed to be consumed. Sigh… nothing is ever easy around here.  Meanwhile, Babette wants to know just what she is meant to do with all those conservative “first girlfriend outfits” that she bought (with Bob’s credit card) for her new role as our nation’s hostess du jour.

Well, three votes isn't too bad, is it?

Well, three votes isn’t too bad, is it?

And from the tooting-our-own-horn department, it has come to my attention that there is a photo circulating around the internet that shows a congressperson with NASCAR-type stickers all over his suit.  I’d like to point out that the original cartoon suggesting this came out a week ago, right here on The Panda Chronicles, so once again, Bob and all the pandas here at The Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire have predicted humor trends once again.

In other Panda News, Young Master Wu, our nation’s youngest (and some might say cutest) panda is about to make his public debut at the San Diego Zoo tomorrow. We are sending the panda kindergarten to report on the story, so don’t forget to tune in next week to see their in-depth coverage of this event! I do hope they don’t get into any trouble!

Be the Bear!

Bob T. what-was-that-about-my-credit-card Panda

Bob Throws His Bamboo into the Ring

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bob for pres

Vote the Panda Party!

It had to happen.  Even with the trials and tribulations of controlling  (HA!) the panda kindergarten, Bob feels that he has no choice but to declare his candidacy  for President.  Of course, there are many questions to be answered.  Does he have to declare zoo panda rental fees in his financial disclosures?  Will Babette be his “first lady”?  Will the panda kindergarten obtain positions in his cabinet?  And what about his birth certificate from the San Diego Zoo?

You can declare your support for a panda in the White House (the first since the Nixon Pandas took up residence there in 1972) by acquiring a Bob T. Panda for President bumper sticker from www.cafepress.com/pandyland

Now, a portion of our meager profits will be donated to Pandas International (no, really, you can ask them!) to support real, actual pandas!  After all, our cartoon ceases to be funny if pandas go extinct!  So, you can skin 2 cats with one purchase, aiding real pandas and declaring your fed-up-ed-ness with politics as usual.  Buy stuff with pandas at Cafe Press Pandyland.  Pandas everywhere will appreciate it.

Be the Bear!

Bob T. Panda