Oh my, just when I thought that the practice of taking selfies couldn’t get any more absurd, (see this post) an observant reader told me that people were taking selfies at the Tour de France. Not only were they taking selfies, they were stepping out into the flow of (really, really, really,) fast bicycle racers in order to do so.
We are talking about bicycle racers with only three fat cells in their entire bodies, who are probably already a little cranky because
A) Someone just compared them to Lance Armstrong,
B) It’s July,
C)There are not actually french fries every where in France,
and
D) Some moron with an iphone – who hasn’t been on a bike since 4th grade – just stepped out in front of them and they crashed and cannot finish the race because their $12,000 Italian racing bike now looks like a leftover pretzel from the Bumpkin County Fair.
Of course, here at The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire felt we had to address this issue, in the mature and respectful way that you have come to expect from us. (Insert fart joke here.)
Sometimes real life news stories make it Just. Too. Easy
Meanwhile back at the Zoo, panda birthday season has begun. I hesitate to admit that I don’t know the birthdays of every U.S. born panda, let alone those born abroad, but Washington DC’s favorite #1 son, Tai Shan, celebrated his 9th birthday on July 9th, and the Meihem twins of Zoo Atlanta have their first birthday coming up this Tuesday! (Ya’ll come back for a special birthday ‘toon on Tuesday, OK?)
Meanwhile, in honor of the publication of my book Pandamorphosis, we are inviting you to post pictures of YOUR copy of Pandamorphosis on The Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire page on Facebook.
Huzzah!
Be the Bear
Bob T. Panda
Will the cub reporters head to Pamploma, Spain for the running of the bulls now? One guy was shown taking a selfie with a huge bull right behind him.
I’m guessing that the cub reporters cannot let this opportunity pass them by, to do something even dumber than stepping in front of a pack of bicyclists. Thank you for the info about the running of the pandas…um I mean the bulls.
If I had to choose between winning the Tour de France or hugging pandas – I’d choose Pandas!!
I really hope they go to Spain. I’m sure the bulls would appreciate some Cuppycakes 🙂
I would much rather hug a panda than watch a bunch of bicycle riders hurtle by. hmmmm, you may get your wish about Spain, but Inspector Panda had to take the week off. He’ll be back next week though.