Tag Archives: 2016 presidential election

Being the Bear

In recent years I have maintained a somewhat strict policy as regarding those awards that other bloggers hand out to recognize their compatriots in the bloggosphere. And that policy is this: DON’T DO IT!!!! But recently, someone who obviously did not know this policy gave me one of those darn awards. Being the bear that I am, I’m making an exception on my zero tolerance policy for a special reason. I’ve known Becky, over at Dark Food to Die For, since she was a teenager. I know her sister. I know her parents. I know all their dogs. I know the dogs they had before they had these dogs.

In other words, we have some history, and it’s been a really fun one. Anyone care for some Potato Dilly Bobs? (Okay, that was an inside joke and I’m not going to explain it, but, Kate, if you’re reading this, I hope you didn’t spew coffee all over your phone.)

Because, after all, pandas are pretty neat!

The other reason I have decided to accept this award, if maybe not complying with ALL the requirements is this: Becky is smart, talented, and creative. She’s worked hard to perfect several creative careers in a world where the rules of engagement keep changing, and yet she keeps going. Plus she’s cute as a bug, like the rest of the members of her family. So, go check at her blog at Dark Food to Die For. Who knows what you may be inspired to do in your kitchen?

But before I comply with some of the rules, (because pandas are rebels, you know) Here is today’s panda-toon, because I know you are going, okay…can we dispense with the warm fuzzy memories of you and your little friends and get on with some panda satire?????

“Be yourself – Everyone else is already taken”
-Oscar Wilde

The Portrait of Dorian Grey is probably the most parodied trope in literature, probably because it’s so irresistible. My favorite is in The Fourth Bear by Jasper Fforde, which I have read countless times. Go read it. I’ll still be here.

Okay, so back to this award thingie.
Rule #1: Acknowledge the blogger that ~~inflicted~~ bestowed this award on you. Thanks a bunch Becky…no really! Check!
Rule #2: Answer the 7 questions that they have provided for you: Okay, here goes:

What is the most recent food photo you took with your phone and why? : Um…I don’t do that. I think it’s weird when people do that. So sue me.
Tell me about your most vivid dream.: I had a couple vivid dreams this past week and I am TOTALLY not going to tell you about the first one, but the second one had a tiger roaming my neighborhood and I had to get myself and my cat (the lately departed Mehitabel) into the house, before it ate us. I realized that my phone was in a different house, so I could not call for rescue. I have no idea what this means, but I remembered the tiger when I woke up. Also that the litter box needed cleaning, but there was no way I was going out there with a tiger running loose.
What is your favorite monster movie?: I don’t really have a favorite monster movie, but there were some really scary monsterish villains in Kung Fu Panda 3. does that count?
Tell me about your best summer ever.: Boy, this is kind of a hard one. If I can count the spring that went before it, (and why the heck can’t I?) It would be the year I spent spring semester at the Delaware Water Gap National Park at an independent art program with 8 other students and various visiting faculty. I think that was the experience that solidified my dedication to painting. Second favorite summer was my first time at Jack Beal and Sondra Freckelton’s workshop in Oneonta NY with about 25 other phenomenally talented painters.
If you were trapped on an island for a year and could only have 3 things with you…what would those 3 things be?: Obviously an inexhaustible supply of cuppycakes, a permanently charged iPad, ( with internet connection) and a panda to keep me company.
Quick: Cats or dogs? Why?: Aren’t pandas and option? If not, then cats. And if you have to ask why, you don’t know cats very well.
What do you know now as a blogger that you wish you knew when you first started?: Well, I’m not sure what I wish I knew, but I can tell you what really surprised me: that I would make so many genuine connections with people who read my ‘toons, and that some of them have become actual in real life friends. That is completely awesome and amazing.

Pandas are no stranger to winning awards!

So before I get around to naming names, here are my seven questions:

If you could be an animal, which one would you be?
What kind of cuppycake are you, and why?
If you could change any event in the history on people on earth, what would you chose?
What is your favorite city (other than the one you live in) that you have visited?
What children’s book did you read as a child that you still love?
If you knew you only had one year to live, what would you do?
What do you wish you had done in your life that you have not?

So, before I list the blogs that I am ~~saddling with all these things to do~~ bestowing this award and my admiration upon, let me just say that any of these bloggers may not wish to participate in the whole award thingie, and that’s fine by me. I just want to recognize some of the blogs that I read regularly and think that you might enjoy them too.

https://vsomethingspeaks.wordpress.com/ Vicky is a fellow pandaholic that found me through Pandas International. We’ve been working on a project together for a while, and while it is as yet unrealized, I hope it will be published someday.

https://wronghands1.com John Atkinson writes hilarious one panel comics that are smart, funny, with puns that make you groan in admiration. He follow my blog early on, which is how I discovered his comics. I don’t know if he still checks in on the pandas, but I think he’s one of the best cartoonists working today. He really doesn’t need this award, because he has lots of people following him, but I just wanted to say, “You’re swell, John!” Plus he’s Canadian and…um…I might need to go there.

http://www.savagechickens.com is another really widely read comic, with chickens, and sometimes cats, doing funny, snarky things. I love these ‘toons.

http://justoutsidetheboxcartoon.com/apples-and-oranges/ Another last minute I just remembered addition. I knew there was someone else I wanted to include on this post! Good thing I was checking my email! More smart, funny stuff from the land on the other side of the globe!

http://theartofnotgettingpublished.blogspot.com One of the things I love about this blog and blogger, is that like me, she’s one of the no longer a spring chicken who is trying to get traditionally published in the kid-lit arena. I also like that she is smart and funny and…um…politically on the same side of the fence as I am. So sue me. Wait, don’t! Because she has a responsible grown-up job, she doesn’t always blog on a regular schedule, but I’m always excited to see one of her posts in my email box and always read it.

https://booksaroundthetable.wordpress.com This blog is the forum for five writers and/or illustrators of books for children. It’s always interesting and has shown me some great art as well. Not to mention I learned that I could go see original drawings from Winnie the Pooh at the Victoria and Albert Museum, from a series of posts here.

http://mynameisyeh.com Okay, Molly Yeh definitely does NOT need my endorsement, and with her schedule certainly does not have time to answer my dumb questions. But I have a serious fan girl crush on her and her life, (not in a creepy way, of course) or maybe it’s just all the CAKES she bakes and takes photos of for her blog. I’m not really sure how I first stumbled on her blog, but if you are a fan of food blogs and goshwejusthavesuchafunlifeandlook!here’saCAKE!!! kind of photos, you will fall in love with Molly and her blog. Did I mention CAKE? She also has a new cookbook out, with recipes that I can actually make and also liberal use of the “F” word, which may be a first for any cookbook I have ever seen. And oh yeah, CAKE!!!! You know how pandas feel about cake.

The Four Panda Kindergarteners of the Apandalypse!

Well, I think that’s it for me and this whole award thing. Just don’t do it again.

Panda On
Bob T Panda

More Alternative Facts

14 Replies

Here at the Panda Chronicles, we are never satisfied with the status quo! Join us in welcoming a new character to the cast, KittySue Conjob. Okay, maybe not welcoming, precisely…because let’s face it, if you think Pinky bends the truth and can be just the tiniest bit annoying, you ain’t seen nothing yet. While creating alternative facts left and right is part and parcel of standard operating procedure here at The Panda Chronicles, that is nothing compared to the whoppers KittySue and her real life inspiration (can you guess who that is? I bet you can!) roll out day after day. But we’re fictional, remember?

But let’s put our paws together for a big pandy welcome to…

Hey! Why are you making another character of questionable ethics a CAT???

Panda on!
Bob T Panda

Voting While Dead

10 Replies

You Know Who swears that this is a thing. Voting while dead. Massive voting fraud. He heard it on Foxy News, so it must be true. Um…no, it’s not. Enough verifiable sources have said voter fraud on this scale is near impossible, especially in the ways you know who said it happened. When is this election going to be over???? OH….it is? Then why is HWMNBN still campaigning?

But, if people are going to vote while dead, they should at least follow some rules.

This isn’t Nam, man! There are rules here!

Panda on!
Bob T Panda

Alternative Facts

4 Replies

You know I couldn’t let this one go by without comment, didn’t you? The Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire strives to be the LEADER in the purveyment of alternative facts. Also alternative words. We ~~make up~~ have the best words here!

Our words are the best!!!!!!

We have the very best facts

Meanwhile, I am eagerly awaiting the arrival of a proof copy of The Panda Chronicles Book 7: Don’t call mee boo boo! And as promised, here is a PARTIAL cover reveal. Heh!

And who might that be, trying to sneak onto the cover of Bubba’s book? Tune in soon for the answer and more of the cover.

I hope you notice the very calming blue, bordering on periwinkle, background color. I thought we all needed to calm down just a little bit.

A small housekeeping detail for all the very generous folks who have contributed to my “support a worthy organization of my choosing and get panda stuff” campaign. I just finished the first batch of printing and doing a small drawing on the first group of goodies. I plan to get them in the mail by week’s end. Any one who donates to either Planned Parenthood or the ACLU between now and the end of February, your prints/drawings will go out in early March. Don’t know what the heck I’m talking about? Check out the information HERE!

And I also want to give thanks to my friends Deborah and Leslie, for making donations in honor and memory of the dearly departed Mehitabel, to their favorite cat charities. I can’t think of a better way to honor my sweet kitty. Well, other than having her remain here on The Panda Chronicles as the voice of reason and authority. Someone has to keep those pandas in line!

Keep Being the bear!

Panda on!
Bob T Panda

Death and Taxes

11 Replies

Accountability is always the question, isn’t it? Especially when it comes to paying taxes and Bubba is right to distrust the tax collector. Should Pinky required to hand over her tax returns? Certainly there are one or two other people around DC who might need to do that.

Meanwhile, I have been so heartened both by the contributions that are being made in honor of The Panda Chronicles (“And Mehitabel! Don’t forget Mehitabel!” said…um…Mehitabel.) and also by the nice notes people have sent me. It means A WHOLE LOT to me that these ‘toons mean a lot to you. I am honored that you spend part of your busy days reading what I do. Those comments really brightened my day, and that is no small thing in these perilous times. You can read about my project here.

Meanwhile, Pinky is up to her old tricks…

Uh oh…it’s the Pinky Revenue Service!

I’m trying not to think about the real Bao Bao leaving DC for China later this month. They haven’t announced the date, and I don’t think they will. She has one last party on February 11th, and sometime after that, a luxury limo will pull up to the panda house, she’ll gather her trunks and suitcases, kiss her mom and dad goodbye, poke her little brother, and head for the airport. But her alter ego is not going anywhere. I hope that will make the sadness of her departure be somewhat less. I know her real life friends Charlene, Maria, and Karen will visit her often.

Panda On and Keep Marching!
Bob T Panda

The Year of the Rooster Really

9 Replies

I jumped the gun on Friday. Not really, because Saturday was the actual start of Chinese New Year, and this is the year of the Red Fire Rooster, or as one of the special friends to pandas, Lucilla T. has dubbed it, the Year of the WUster!!!!!! (Referring, of course, to everybody’s favorite panda, Mr. Wu of the San Diego panda clan.) (Okay, I know I am about to get a lot of heat here about who is the best panda ebber. Let’s just say I have a thing for the Wu Self and leave it at that.)

And if you are looking for a special recipe for your celebrations, hop on over to Vicky Vladic’s blog VSomethingSpeaks for a yummy chicken recipe. That’s if you’d rather eat your rooster, rather than party with it.

Meanwhile, here is my actual new ‘toon commemorating the Year of the Rooster!

It’s the year of the WUster!!!!

Panda On!
Bob T Panda

BTW, you’ll notice I did not lead with political outrage, although, trust me, it’s still there and getting worse every day. I just read a recent article on Medium about how to remain outraged without losing your mind. I highly recommend it! I already knew I was going to intersperse snarky political ‘toons with lighter panda fare, and this article confirmed we need to do both, in order to keep our sanity, not burn out, but also not let important crimes against humanity go unremarked. It’s getting very interesting out there. As in train wreck interesting, not fluffy kittens interesting.

There’s Something Happening Here…

24 Replies

...what it is ain’t exactly clear.…Things are happening very fast and I don’t think it is a good thing. When you are steering a ship of state, which is much bigger, than say, the Titanic, it seems like you would want to chart your course carefully, lest you, ya know, run into an iceberg. Not just barrel on ahead, because you like the sound of your own voice that much.

Heh.

Meanwhile, there is no such thing as an alternative fact, unless you are talking about speculative science fiction. Are we still allowed to use the word “science”? It’s good to remember that not everything is as it exactly appears in any particular snapshot (or screenshot!) But that doesn’t mean we should not pay attention. Or talk about what we’ve read or heard. Question everything, and let your representatives know how you feel, good and bad.

Our Future is at stake. Let’s treat it like it means something. Keep the conversation going.

Are all these paper clips mine?

Panda On!
Bob T Panda

The Million Panda March

18 Replies

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if there were a million pandas available to march? I know they would all be ready to go! Because pandas are not strangers to protests! I attended our small, (comparatively speaking) local march, because I did not feel comfortable going into Seattle, where they were expecting 10’s of thousands of people. At 4 PM on Saturday, the day of the march, estimates of attendance was at about 200,000. That’s people, not pandas. We don’t have any pandas here.

At our own event in Langley, I was expecting maybe 50 old hippies wearing tie-dye t-shirts, but lo and behold, when I arrived at the starting point, I could see maybe a couple hundred people milling around. I was waiting with one friend, who was waiting for her daughter, and after chatting with her for about 15 minutes as people filed past, I decided to hop in when I saw some other friends who had joined the march. As we turned onto the route, you could see that the entire street was full, with 10-12 people across, going all the way down to the corner, and already turning the corner, with almost as many people behind us. Unofficial estimates of attendance are at around 2,000. There aren’t that many people that live in town!

But pandas are no strangers to protest!

Pandas aren’t dopes!

The early days of panda rights groups….

“I felt so violated!”

And here is a photo of our gathering in Langley. Huzzah! It didn’t rain, and I marched, picked up my mail, and was home in under 2 hours. You can’t beat that!

Women’s March, Langley edition!

Panda On!
Never give up working for peace and human …um…I mean panda rights!
Bob T Panda

What if You Gave an Inauguration & Nobody Came?

27 Replies

Hoo boy! We are right here, at ~~Apocalypse~~ Inauguration Eve, and I gotta tell you, my tummy is doing flip flops. I don’t even know if I can get all these cuppycakes down that I have lined up on the counter in front of me. Despite a certain party’s claims to the contrary, you can find a ball gown in DC, and apparently hotel rooms are available too. On the one hand, you hate to rile up a person with so thin a skin and such a penchant for vindictiveness.

On the other hand, there is this:

Hey, save some cuppycakes for me!

Panda On, and let’s be safe out there!
Bob T Panda

And did anyone get my nod to the old Bob and Ray “Wally Ballou” routines, where they joined the roving reporter midway through his introduction? We need anything we can find to cheer ourselves up! Enjoy!

Join the Panda March this Saturday!

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If you want to be where the action is the day after THE DAY AFTER, be sure to join one of the Women’s Marches that will taking place around the country. And yes, I put the phrase The Day After in scary SHOUTYCAPS/ all bold typing in reference to one of those post apocalyptic movies about the end of the world. The pandas are planning to march and I hope you will too. We are having a local march in Langley and I plan to attend. Maybe we’ll all go out for coffee and cuppycakes after. It’s shaping up to be that kind of week.

Join the #WePreferPinky Movement today!

Whats a protest without pandas?

Panda On!
Bob T Panda

I’d like to thank writer Deborah Underwood for coming up with the term “SHOUTYCAPS” to describe the feeling you get when someone writes in all capital letters. That’s why they pay her the big bucks. (Actually, hardly any writers for children make big bucks, so if you are looking for some really fun books for kids in your life, do check out her books at your local bookstore or on her website! She and her cat will thank you!)