Tag Archives: Barker Carlson

They are not “Stories” They are LIES!

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I swear the GQP is really trying to cause our blood pressure to soar so that our heads explode, and then since all the democrats will have exploded heads, we won’t be able to vote and they will be left to rule over their followers who, I think they actually despise. Won’t that be funny? Okay…not ain a “ha ha funny” kind of way, but “funny ironic” way.

Against our better judgement, somehow, Kitty Sue Conjob and Barker Carlson found their way on to the ZooNooZ set, with the results you might have already imagined. This story was ripped (off) from the real NooZ headlines. I bet you’ve heard something about it.

It has not escaped my remembery that today is International Talk Like a Pirate Day, so over on the Sub stacks, I have shared my annual tribute to Pirate Wu!

I know it’s hard, but we must not lose heart. we must panda on!

Be the Bear!
Bob T shiver me timbers Panda

Have We Seen the Last of Barker?

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Alas…probably not. Like a bad penny, he is likely to turn up where we least expect him, and want him there even less. And in case you were wondering, it is true that he once did a segment on his “show” about pandas being sex crazed and vicious. Humph! The nerve!

We will return to our previous story next week. In the meantime, hold onto your hats. I wish we could say it will be all pandas all the time, but there are (alas!) powerful forces in the world that we must (we must! we must!) comment on.

Be the Bear
Bob T and the Pookies! Panda

Buh Bye Barker (Part 1)

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It is a true fact, and therefore not defamatory, that Tucker Carlson was “let go” (aka sent to a farm upstate) by Foxxy Nooz. So sad! Alas, we likely have not seen the last of him. More terrible things are happening out in the real world. We can’t even. Noo shit has come to light about Rooty Patootie (aka “Amurika’s Mayor”) that I can barely even read about, let alone write about it here.

If the ‘toons are not all pandas, all the time, it is the fault of reality and my inability to ignore it. Deal with it.

We’re just asking questions!

Be the Bear
Bob T is not sure of survival Panda

Barker Carlson is O-U-T at Foxy Nooz!!!!

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I had another ‘toon planned for today, but this morning one of my very alert Panda-spondants alerted me to the VERY exciting nooz, that Tucker Carlson had been fired! No buh bye broadcast, no nothing, although I’m sure he left with his pockets stuffed with filthy “sorry we had to fire you so you wouldn’t cost us more” lucre, no doubt. I imagine they had to do that on top of just agreeing to pay Dominion Voting Software $787.5 MILLION bucks.

In honor of the exodus of Barker from Foxy Nooz, I thought I would share some of his finest moments, as dramatized by The Panda Chronicles. It is the best place to get the Nooz, after all!

Did I just see what I thought I saw?

Then there were his Panda Defamation statements!!!!

truth
Foxxy “News” lies like a rug.
truth
Pandas COULD bite your head off if they really wanted to.
When the truth is found… to beeee lies….

While, I’m sure we have not seen the last of Barker, it is gratifying in a schaudenfreudenish way to know that there was actually a line, he crossed it, and got canned. Of course we know the line is how much money was his continued presence going to cost old Rupert, but still… I, for one, am happy that he is having a really bad day.

Alas, we know that there is much mischief this malignant man-child is capable of. I mean…if you thought TFG was bad. Could this be the shove that propels him into politics? I hope not, but the way things are going, I wouldn’t hold my breath for Glinda, the Good Witch of the North to show up any time soon.

Till next time…

Be the Bear!
Bob T I wasn’t the one who got fired today Panda