Tag Archives: cuppycakes

OMG It’s Tax Time!

The Panda Revenue Service wants YOU! Because once again, at least in the United S of A, it is tax time, which means hand over that wallet!! Fortunately, the Panda Kindergarten Accounting Service is ready, willing and…um…well, while not exactly able, they do have an adding machine…to help you with your calculations.

They will be looking very closely at the returns of any known cats, as you may well imagine, because …um CATS!!!!!!

Will Bob ever learn? Will Mehitabel ever get the better of the panda kindergarten?

And because it is good to have something to laugh at through your tears, here are some of our other favorites to help you procrastinate just a little longer this weekend!

And it was ever thus….

Much better to take a selfie with pandas!

Princess Pinky helps with new years resolutions

You say you want a resolution, well, you know, it is hard to change a bear….I love Pinky when she is sorry she did something.

And if you want to get into some serious procrastination this weekend, wouldn’t it be a good idea to order all the http://www.yourbrainonpandas.com/book-table/ for your very own? They contain HOURS of procrastinatory panda goodness!

Okay then….where did I put my income records?

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

Fabulous Furry Friday Salutes…

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…Easter! Bring on the marshmallow peeps, the malted milk candy covered Easter eggs, the chocolate pandas and…what…wait…

What do you mean there are no chocolate pandas for my Easter basket. Only BUNNIES????? I thought Easter was all about pandas! and how the Easter Panda brings treats to all the good little girls and boys….

What’s Black and White and carries cuppycakes in a basket?

Of course, once certain members of the panda kindergarten came on the scene, the tradition became more of …um…a trick or treat kind of experience.

A tiskitt a taskitt , a great big wheelie basket!

Once again, Fabulous Furry Friday brings you the REAL story!

Be the (Easter) Bear!
Bob T. Panda

Fabulous Furry Friday Presents Great News!

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OK, unlike most of what we talk about here, this is totally serious and we are not making this up! The most recent panda census results are in and the wild panda population is up, possibly by as much as 17%. This is great news, because, well…pandas!

Not that we don’t make fun of serious things like the panda census. Of course, some people (and you know who you are, bro) might point out that China’s relationship to statistics is not um…entirely unlike that of the panda kindergarten.

Do we have to count panda adoption fees?

Is it any wonder Bob has a sharp pain behind his ears?

And here is more panda fun…because…um…pandas!

Always read the directions…

And because our heads are filled with thoughts of cuppycakes….

I smell frosting!

And because it’s that time of year….

Will Bob ever learn? will Mehitabel ever get the better of the panda kindergarten?

Let’s put pandas to work!
Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

We proudly support Pandas International, because without pandas, there could be no panda satire!

What could be more Fabulous than Friday?

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Next week we take a look at The Giant Panda Zoo Awards ceremony and all your favorite pandas will be there! Will Pinky attempt to wrestle the gold medal for Panda Personality of the Year away from her cousin, Princess Dumpling? Does Babette de Panda have something up her haute couture sleeve to disrupt the ceremony? What skullduggery will Inspector Panda and his very clever assistant Mr. Wu uncover? Did Mei Xiang hide Pinky’s magical wand so she can’t…um…make adjustments to the awards?

Stay tuned till Sunday, when all will be revealed. We thought we would share some of Pinky’s triumphs and moments of glory to get you in the mood.

Uh oh! This year they only got BRONZE in bestie habitat!

“Do you know who I am????” Yeah, we do.

Beware, the power of the paw!

Princess Pinky is drawing a line in the sandbox.

Pinky answers difficult questions from the press in her own way.

Have a Fabulous Furry Friday! And don’t forget, your purchase of all of the Panda Chronicle Books (and Pandamorphosis) helps to keep the panda satire coming your way. Not to mention that you can have panda fun at home seven days a week. Huzzah!

And, if you love the artwork of Pandamorphosis, prints of all the major images from the book are available from my page at The Gratitude Gallery website. Check ’em out! You might also enjoy visiting some of our friends, pandas and not, from our Pandas Love Links page. Tell em we said “Hi!”

Tea Time for Pandas

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In our never ending quest to bring culture to the panda kindergarten, Bob decides to introduce them to the quintessential English High Tea, complete with little cucumber sandwiches and…um…cuppycakes. It is tea time for pandas!

The long, dark tea time of the soul….

I think it is time for a little something! I feel rather 11 o’clock-ish.

Just a reminder to stay tuned to this station on your internet dial, as next week we bring you more from the Giant Panda Zoo Awards! Interviews with award winning pandas, as they walk on the red carpet and pass through the velvet ropes, keeping the riff-raff away (and of course, by riff-raff, we mean anyone who isn’t Pinky)

Get ready for a star studded evening as all the nominated pandas strut their stuff for their fans.

Till then, Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda

Bao Bao Responds to Her Defeat…

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Today, our nation’s number one panda, Bao Bao responds to her stunning defeat in this years Giant Panda Zoo Awards. The GPZA is a little like the Acadamy Awards, for pandas, so it’s easy to see why little miss Pinky would be so um…shall we say agitated? by her disappointing showing in this year’s voting.

But first, we have a story of sordid deception, tragedy, sugar overload, unfair advantage and death by chocolate, brought to our attention by one of our alert readers, Ms Jayelle of Brooklyn NY, about some hunting practices that IMHO are just the tiniest bit unfair, not to mention not very sporting. Now before anyone gets their panties in a knot, let me say I am an unashamed carnivore, or I suppose more accurately, omnivore. I have friends and neighbors who hunt deer and elk and stock their freezers to feed their family for the winter.

I say bravo, and that they are more honest eaters than I am, as the only hunting I do is for what’s on sale at our local grocery store. But this tale, from the bear centric area of New Hampshire smacks of unfairness to me. I mean, who doesn’t know that bears love sweets, and that chocolate can kill your dog if he eats enough of it. So, in the spirit of the Panda Chronicles, (meaning that we make fun of stuff, no matter how serious it actually is) here is our response to this story.

If I have but one life to live, let me give it for a cuppycake.

And now, as promised, Princess Pinky’s first response to the news that she did not win the gold medal in the Giant Panda Zoo Awards, (despite her…um…best efforts)

You might want to cover your ears.

Don’t tell me you’re surprised.

We’ll have more from our recorded coverage of the actual Giant Panda Awards ceremony, coming to you on The Panda Channel, host of Zoonooz, in the weeks to come. Stay tuned so you don’t miss it, or better yet, sign up to get new posts three times a week in your inbox. You can also sign up for our monthly (I swear I am going to get to this really soon) Newsletter. Both sign-ups are at the top of the right hand column on all pages, except for the home page.

Be the bear!
Bob T. Panda

You can bring a bear to culture…

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…but you can’t make them behave themselves.

You know the old saying, you can bring a bear to culture, but you can’t make them learn the ancient rites of the tea ceremony, but that doesn’t stop Bob from trying to bring culture and refinement to the panda kindergarten. I can hardly write that last sentence without snorting and giggling madly. Some how, “culture and refinement” used in the same sentence as “panda kindergarten” invokes the image of merriment and …um…Meihem.

You can lead a bear to culture, but….

Hmmm…Bob will have to call on his inner panda to recover from this learning experience with the panda kindergarten. As you may have noticed, Pinky and the Meihems are now full members in good (or is that bad?) standing in the panda kindergarten. Pinky was a first round draft pick.

I can’t let the Martin Luther King Jr. Holiday go by, without mentioning that it marks my 27th year of creative self employment. While I have had to be even more creative in the last six years in the making a living part, it has been an excellent ride, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. In fact, had the economy not gone sideways, panda satire might never have come into existence! And isn’t that a thought that would keep you up at night?

Keep Being the bear. I couldn’t do it without you.
Bob T. Panda

Pinky’s Snow Day; Part ‘C’

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The liddle pandas have come in and hung up their coats, taken off their boots, and settled in for a little refreshment! What is a snow day without a steaming cup of cocoa?

Meanwhile, all seems to be quiet on the Northwestern front. Progress is being made on another pending project, The Panda Chronicles Cuppycake Cookbook: Favorite Recipes of the Panda Kindergarten. This is a project that has been in the works (between other projects) for a little over a year, with panda and panda satire aficionado Vicky Vladic, who hails from Australia. You can read more about her over at her blog, VSomethingSpeaks.

You might say that this collaboration is a child of the internet, since I have never been to Australia and I’m pretty sure she’s never been to the Pacific Northwest Washington State. We never would have met, let alone have an easy way to work on a project together, were it not for the world wide cyber living room, where you can find just about anything…even pandas! Stay tuned to this here site, if you like pandas and cuppycakes (and let’s face it, who doesn’t like frosting?)

But now, there are some pandas waiting!

Well, they did hang their coats up.

The way of the princess never runs smoothly.

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

On the 10th, 11th, and 12th Day of Crisp-Moss:

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Yes, and technically speaking, 31 Days of Pandas is over, but as I ran out of month before I ran out of verses, (and certain, shall we say, impatient, members of our audience wanted us to just get on with it and post the whole darn thing) we bring you the last three days of Crisp-Moss all at once.

Huzzah!

And now, The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire presents:
The 12 Days of Crisp-Moss!!!!!

On the twelfth day of Crisp-Moss, My Panda cam Did See….

MX: no, Pinky, you may NOT have a Bamboo-tini!

I can’t hear you….

F-F-F-FI-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE Cuppycaaaaaaakes!

whew!

Once more with feeling….And a Pinky in a Hemlock Tree!

Everybody sing!

Okay, is everyone ready to sing? (and personally, I think that the NZ Panda-Nanny staff would love, love, love it if you serenaded them with this song, tomorrow when you go to visit Pinky and Mum and Dad at the zoo.)

On the Twelth day of Crispmoss, my panda cam did see:

Twelve Pinky Presents,
Eleven Bamboo-tinis,
Ten Pandas Leaping,
Nine Pandarinas,
Eight Santa’s sleigh bears,
Seven pandas chasing,
Six pandas driving,

FII-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE CUPPYCAAAAAAAAAAAKES!

Four pandas sneaking,
Three triplets napping,
Two Meihems plotting
and
A Pinky in a Hemlock Treeeeeeeeeeeee!

Huzzah! And because as I type this, it is New Year’s Eve (well, except in the places where it is already the New Year) I leave you with the panda kindergarten, celebrating New Year’s Eve in their own very special way.

Happy New Years, from The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire!

I can’t tell you enough times or how much it means to me, that you have chosen to be the bears. Thank you all, and the happiest of New Years.

Bob T. Panda

On the 7th day of Crisp-Moss…

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On the 7th day of Crisp-Moss, My panda cam did see…

Oh no! Not again!

F-F-F-FI-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE Cuppycaaaaaaakes!

whew!

Is everyone ready to sing along? Okay, here we go:

On the 7th day of crisp-Moss, my panda cam did see,
Seven pandas chasing,
Six pandas driving,

FII-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE CUPPYCAAAAAAAAAAAKES!

Four pandas sneaking,
Three triplets napping,
Two Meihems plotting
and
A Pinky in a Hemlock Treeeeeeeeeeeee!

Doesn’t that feel good?

I’m starting to look at what the New Year will bring, and I have plans and resolutions as regards The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire. One thing I really must do is to get better about sending out a monthly newsletter. So many people have signed up to receive news of panda satire, and I have been really falling down on the job. It means that I have to reassess how much time I spend on various social media. I’ll still be there but maybe not quite as much, and it will be when I’ve gotten all my other work done. Once upon a time, I didn’t even have internet access at home, and still maintained The Panda Chronicles.

How did I do it? heck if I can remember, but do it, I did, and now I must take myself in paw, because I have big plans for next year, which I will start letting you in on in my newsletters, which i swear I will start writing any day now.

The 12 Days of Crisp-moss will be wrapping up on New Year’s Day, which means you will get three days worth of panda fun in one day. After that, I will take a short break and return on Sunday, January 4th with a brand new cartoon, and then return to my pre-31 days of pandas schedule of new ‘toons on Sundays and Wednesdays, with a encore presentation on Fridays.

Do continue to alert me to panda news or any other news story of the absurd that you think might have an application in panda satire. Use the form on the contact us page to be sure the comment gets to me. Or just use it to say “hello” or “I think you are the most brilliant cartoonist to walk the face of the earth since Bill Watterson retired.” Or something like that.

Once again, I wish you peace, happiness, health, and pandas in the new year. Thank you all for being the bears. May your inner pandas rejoice in the wonders of life, and may you always have enough cuppycakes to share.

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

And now, The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire presents: The 12 Days of Crisp-Moss!!!!!

Once more with feeling….And a Pinky in a Hemlock Tree!

FII-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE CUPPYCAAAAAAAAAAAKES!

On the 7th day of Crisp-Moss, My panda cam did see…

FII-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE CUPPYCAAAAAAAAAAAKES!

And now, The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire presents:
The 12 Days of Crisp-Moss!!!!!