Surely there is more room in the Panda House
Be the Bear
Bob T is not watching Mittens Town Hall Panda
Somebody’s going to (Mom) Jail
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Tag Archives: Humor
Our Story (Remember that?) Continues
Now where were we?
So as I recall, PPJ showed up, poofed Frank, Mikey, Bikkie, and Pookie into a hot air balloon and off they went. Meanwhile, Josie finally found her way from Alaska to the Panda House at the National Zoo.
Okay! you are caught up.
Meanwhile, Friend to Bears Lucilla suggested that a gathering of pandas to say farewell to Ya Ya as she returns to China would be a fun thing. I immediately pounced (like a cat!) on this as a way to wrap up a story that seemed (like a hot air balloon) to be drifting aimlessly on the breeze.
Maybe don’t stand right under the balloon?
Be the Bear!
Bob T I bet somebody is gonna get grounded Panda
May the Fourth Be With You…
…for all who celebrate!
Surrender your pandas!
Sadly, we are destined to be a country without pandas in the next year or two. San Diego’s pandas were sent to China in 2019, and the pandemic, not to mention TFG’s crappy stances on China meant we weren’t going to get a new panda loan agreement any time soon. Noted panda writer Henry Nicholls wrote an opinion piece for CNN about our addiction to domesticated pandas. That might not be quite how he put it, but he does have a point.
Pandas in the wild are different animals, and now it appears there may be some genetic difference between pandas that live in the wild and pandas that grew up on the all you can eat cruise ship model. “Pandas are solitary? Who knew?!!!!” said a group of pandas sitting around the table chowing down on boo shoots while playing Mah Jong.
Any way, now Ya Ya is on her way back to Beijing, alas without Le Le who succumbed to a previously undiagnosed heart ailment.
Could story lines collide soon? I guess we’ll find out.
Stay tuned for further developments!
Be the Bear!
Bob T pass the endless boo buffet Panda
If you haven’t read Henry Nicholls’ The Way of the Panda, you should fix that immediately. It’s a great book about all things pandas, the politics of pandas, and there is a cameo appearance of a ‘toon that was perhaps done by your favorite practitioner of panda satire! My literary claim to fame!
Bears Will be Bears
Who would have guessed that bears could smell the soda WHILE IT WAS STILL IN THE CAN?
Also that they don’t like diet soda.
Alert readers clued me in to this story about a bear who mistook this woman’s Subearu for a soda machine!
It DEFINITELY was not Frank or Mikey (or Pookie!)
Be the Bear!
Bob T did we mention Tucker got fired Panda
Barker Carlson is O-U-T at Foxy Nooz!!!!
I had another ‘toon planned for today, but this morning one of my very alert Panda-spondants alerted me to the VERY exciting nooz, that Tucker Carlson had been fired! No buh bye broadcast, no nothing, although I’m sure he left with his pockets stuffed with filthy “sorry we had to fire you so you wouldn’t cost us more” lucre, no doubt. I imagine they had to do that on top of just agreeing to pay Dominion Voting Software $787.5 MILLION bucks.
In honor of the exodus of Barker from Foxy Nooz, I thought I would share some of his finest moments, as dramatized by The Panda Chronicles. It is the best place to get the Nooz, after all!
Then there were his Panda Defamation statements!!!!
While, I’m sure we have not seen the last of Barker, it is gratifying in a schaudenfreudenish way to know that there was actually a line, he crossed it, and got canned. Of course we know the line is how much money was his continued presence going to cost old Rupert, but still… I, for one, am happy that he is having a really bad day.
Alas, we know that there is much mischief this malignant man-child is capable of. I mean…if you thought TFG was bad. Could this be the shove that propels him into politics? I hope not, but the way things are going, I wouldn’t hold my breath for Glinda, the Good Witch of the North to show up any time soon.
Till next time…
Be the Bear!
Bob T I wasn’t the one who got fired today Panda
Bears in the Nooz!
So many bears! So much Nooz!
Bears will be Bears!
Be the Bear!
Bob T pass the jelly beans Panda
We Now Return to Our Story…
…at least for a little bit!
What will happen next?!?!?!?! When will it happen?!?!?! Who knows??????
Be the Bear
Bob T I just got back from Atlanta Panda
Nixon’s Ghost Still Won’t Go Away
Ya know, no matter how much we would like Stupid Watergate to go away, it will not.
Twice impeached, indicted on 34 counts (so far), still committing (alleged) crimes left and right….
Be the Bear
Bob T what’s a little larceny among friends Panda
BTW I have another post on Substack and they have a new Twidder-like thingie called Notes. If you are subscribed to my Noozletter, you can hop onto notes and join the conversation. So far, there are a lot of the writers showing pictures of their cats a dogs. I think they could use more pandas!
Fugitive Tigers Terrify in Tornado Tempest
I am much better at finding “P” words than I am at “T” words, other than Trouble that starts with a capital “T” and that rhymes with “P” and that stands for PANDA!!! The Nooz crossed my screen about some tigers that escaped during a recent tornado that touched down somewhere in Georgia, fell on the fence of the tiger enclosure and wouldn’t you know? Cats, being cats, they escaped! Hopefully they didn’t find any poodles (poodles are what tigers like best!) and maybe only found a shouty blonde congress”person”.
Here kitty kitty!
I wanted to let those of you who *might* miss me on Twidder (No judgment if you’re still there, but I just can’t bring myself to be there) that Substack has this new thing called “Notes” which is a Twidder-like conversation space. In fact, it is enough like Twidder, that it has Elmo pissed off and he is blocking links to Substack posts. (Hopefully without the a**holes, but we’ll see) and I think if you are subscribed to any of the Noozletters there (like mine, for instance) you can converse there too. Is it worth it? Who knows? But if you want to say hi to me there, you can. You can follow this link to get started.
Be the Bear
Bob T watch out for tigers Panda
Animals Are United: Don’t Let the GOP Co-opt Us
Well…first the elephants rebelled. “We are kind, we take care of all vulnerable members of our community. We are loyal and we remember those who have treated us kindly. Is there ANYTHING in that description that makes you think of the GOP? I think not.”
So we thought…spineless…shape shifting…poisonous…I know! Jellyfish!
But alas…
I could not resist
Be the Bear!
Bob T I have the sense of humor of an 8th grader Panda