Tag Archives: Institute for contemporary panda satire

Welcome to 2015 at The Panda Chronicles!

It’s hard to imagine how I can top last year, especially after the end of 31 days of Pandas (which ended up being more like 47 days of pandas with all the Inspector Panda re-caps back in November) but now we are back to another year of panda hijinks.

Will there be new American cubs to push Pinky out of first place in the youngest panda in America standings?

Will Mr. Wu get to work on another case with Inspector Panda?

Will Pinky and the Meihems work out their differences in order to combat the impending menace of new cubby siblings? (And will Mr. Wu be able to stop gloating if this happens?)

What will this year’s “Panda Season of Love” bring? Can we possibly make any more fun of pandas than we already have?

And speaking of Inspector Panda, why is it that we have not seen Inspector Panda and Bob T. panda in the same cartoon frame?

These, and many more questions that you had no intention of asking, may very well be answered in the coming months. so in the meantime, sit back and enjoy the first NEW!!! cartoon of the year.

Huzzah!

Inspired by a conversation at the grocery store…

The idea for this ‘toon came about when I ran into a writer pal at the grocery store the other day. He suggested that perhaps I had a crew of pandas over in my studio, doing at least some of my work for me. Instantly, the light bulb went off in my head (either that, or I was having a stroke) and this cartoon formed itself in my head.

See? Even when I am supposedly off the clock, the Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire is working for you. Work, work, work, work.

Happy New Year! More to come! Huzzah!

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

PS: Oh yeah...buy books, okay? Kitty need new shoes.

On the 10th, 11th, and 12th Day of Crisp-Moss:

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Yes, and technically speaking, 31 Days of Pandas is over, but as I ran out of month before I ran out of verses, (and certain, shall we say, impatient, members of our audience wanted us to just get on with it and post the whole darn thing) we bring you the last three days of Crisp-Moss all at once.

Huzzah!

And now, The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire presents:
The 12 Days of Crisp-Moss!!!!!

On the twelfth day of Crisp-Moss, My Panda cam Did See….

MX: no, Pinky, you may NOT have a Bamboo-tini!

I can’t hear you….

F-F-F-FI-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE Cuppycaaaaaaakes!

whew!

Once more with feeling….And a Pinky in a Hemlock Tree!

Everybody sing!

Okay, is everyone ready to sing? (and personally, I think that the NZ Panda-Nanny staff would love, love, love it if you serenaded them with this song, tomorrow when you go to visit Pinky and Mum and Dad at the zoo.)

On the Twelth day of Crispmoss, my panda cam did see:

Twelve Pinky Presents,
Eleven Bamboo-tinis,
Ten Pandas Leaping,
Nine Pandarinas,
Eight Santa’s sleigh bears,
Seven pandas chasing,
Six pandas driving,

FII-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE CUPPYCAAAAAAAAAAAKES!

Four pandas sneaking,
Three triplets napping,
Two Meihems plotting
and
A Pinky in a Hemlock Treeeeeeeeeeeee!

Huzzah! And because as I type this, it is New Year’s Eve (well, except in the places where it is already the New Year) I leave you with the panda kindergarten, celebrating New Year’s Eve in their own very special way.

Happy New Years, from The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire!

I can’t tell you enough times or how much it means to me, that you have chosen to be the bears. Thank you all, and the happiest of New Years.

Bob T. Panda

On the 7th day of Crisp-Moss…

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On the 7th day of Crisp-Moss, My panda cam did see…

Oh no! Not again!

F-F-F-FI-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE Cuppycaaaaaaakes!

whew!

Is everyone ready to sing along? Okay, here we go:

On the 7th day of crisp-Moss, my panda cam did see,
Seven pandas chasing,
Six pandas driving,

FII-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE CUPPYCAAAAAAAAAAAKES!

Four pandas sneaking,
Three triplets napping,
Two Meihems plotting
and
A Pinky in a Hemlock Treeeeeeeeeeeee!

Doesn’t that feel good?

I’m starting to look at what the New Year will bring, and I have plans and resolutions as regards The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire. One thing I really must do is to get better about sending out a monthly newsletter. So many people have signed up to receive news of panda satire, and I have been really falling down on the job. It means that I have to reassess how much time I spend on various social media. I’ll still be there but maybe not quite as much, and it will be when I’ve gotten all my other work done. Once upon a time, I didn’t even have internet access at home, and still maintained The Panda Chronicles.

How did I do it? heck if I can remember, but do it, I did, and now I must take myself in paw, because I have big plans for next year, which I will start letting you in on in my newsletters, which i swear I will start writing any day now.

The 12 Days of Crisp-moss will be wrapping up on New Year’s Day, which means you will get three days worth of panda fun in one day. After that, I will take a short break and return on Sunday, January 4th with a brand new cartoon, and then return to my pre-31 days of pandas schedule of new ‘toons on Sundays and Wednesdays, with a encore presentation on Fridays.

Do continue to alert me to panda news or any other news story of the absurd that you think might have an application in panda satire. Use the form on the contact us page to be sure the comment gets to me. Or just use it to say “hello” or “I think you are the most brilliant cartoonist to walk the face of the earth since Bill Watterson retired.” Or something like that.

Once again, I wish you peace, happiness, health, and pandas in the new year. Thank you all for being the bears. May your inner pandas rejoice in the wonders of life, and may you always have enough cuppycakes to share.

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

31 Days of Pandas Returns!

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Here we go with days 12, 13, and 14, delayed by the windstorm and power outage (which was finally over at about 1 AM this morning) that commenced Thursday evening, of December 11th. All is well here at headquarters of The Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire. Well, now it is, anyway. The sun is shining and it was a lovely day to go out and move fallen branches from the yard and driveway to spots that are less inconvenient for them to exist in.

But enough about you and your problems, I hear coming from the cheap seats. Where are all these panda cartoons that you were allegedly working on by candle light while you had nothing better to do, since you couldn’t check your twitter feed ad infinitum?

OK, OK, already. Here’s the next episode of The Case of the Picturesque Panda:

Oh, Inspector Panda! What a surprise!

And for those of you who follow the antics of Bob T. Panda and his Junior Panda Friends on Facebook, you may have seen a notice that Princess Pinky has something dastardly in mind, to perhaps skew the voting in the Giant Zoo Panda Awards.

Pinky, I thought we agreed you wouldn’t do anything naughty.

This will not stand!

A big pandy thank you to all of you who have ordered books this month. Remember, I will make a donation to Pandas International for each copy of Pandamorphosis or any of the Panda Chronicles series books that you buy this month, so now’s the time to buy, buy buy!

We’ll be back sometime tomorrow with the next episode of Inspector Panda and then I have a special Holidays with Pandas surprise (that just popped into my head a few days ago!) Huzzah!

See you tomorrow!
Be the Bear<
Bob T. Panda

Fabulous Furry Friday Presents…

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More from the “Panda Beware” series of encore presentations!

We really need to more thoroughly check the panda kindergarten’s reading list.

pass the cookies, okay?

Huzzah! Misery bear!

To the moon, Alice!

Hey, and while we’re at it, check out all the take-home-your-own-pandas goodness on our book page. It’s never too early to start shopping for the holidays! Black and white Friday is right around the corner.

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

Pandas Celebrate Banned Books Week

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Can we make this kind of stuff up? No we cannot. It is Banned Books Week, those scandalous literary tomes that send some people scurrying for their zippo lighters, and no books make censorious individuals fan the fierce flames of fascism more, than books that celebrate….

The Literature of the Panda?????

Yeah, right. But to celebrate all banned books, we bring you an encore presentation of some of Bob T’s works of literary genius! Huzzah! Where’s my zippo?

Bob’s first foray into the realms of literature …

What could be more fun than blobbing…I mean blogging?

If any book should be banned….

And lest we forget that there STILL is no MacArthur Grant for Panda Satire….

In my non-panda-satirizing time (what little there is of that,) I’ve been reading the new book by Elizabeth Bird, Julie Danielson, and Peter D. Sieruta, Wild Things: Acts of Mischief in Children’s Literature, which is a great read in honor of Banned Books Week. It’s full of untold scandals, books that were banned (and burned!) quite often by people who hadn’t actually read them, they’d just heard there was something naughty about them. It’s quite an eye opening read, especially if you thought children’s literature was all fluffy bunnies and sleepy kitties. Not only that, but it is giving me a great reading list of books I want to read. I highly recommend it…um…when you are done reading The Panda Chronicles, anyway.

Hope you are having a happy banned book week! Read something naughty today!

And speaking of Books to be Banned, the fifth book in the Panda Chronicles series will be coming out next month! Huzzah! If you want a sneak peak at the cover, make sure you are signed up for my newsletter which I swear I am going to write and send out next week. Look for the link at the top of the right hand column that says:

Be the Bear,
Bob T Panda

Pandas: Masters of the Pregnant Paws

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**Please note: In Friday’s post, I messed up Mehitabel’s story links on Cat Stories, but now it is fixed. You can read her story here. Or maybe the panda kindergarten is responsible for this misdeed.

The proliferation of phony panda pregnancy plots are prancing through the panda sphere. Oh PPPah! we proclaim! These punctilious pundits are profoundly proficient in propelling poppycock pertaining to prevaricating perfidious pandas. Phooey!

Gosh, that was fun!

Everyone who knows anything about pandas, knows that not only is it notoriously difficult to get a captive panda pregnant, but also that once the deed has been done, it is impossible to tell if they actually are pregnant until the little bundle (or bundles) of joy appear. There is much real information on pseudo-pregnancy in pandas, should they care to look for it.

Of course, these journalistic faux paws make excellent fodder for panda satire, and so, we thank you for your idiotic news story. One small misstep for man, one giant leap for panda satire.

Prevaricating pandas perceived in pregnancy pastry ploy

Meanwhile back at the ranch, Pandamorphosis is now out on iBooks and Kindle! Huzzah! You can check it out right from here! Progress is being made on Book 5 of The Panda Chronicles as is the work to make the previous books available for your Kindles, etc. Whee! Who says pandas are Luddites?

Happy Labor day to those pandanistas in the US, and to everyone else, it’s back to work with you! Tomorrow is just plain old Monday!

Be the Bear!
Bob T. Panda.

Inspector Panda immersed in Art

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Every once in a while I like to remind myself that I do know a bit about art, despite the fact that many (ok, most) of the art history slide lectures I sat through caused me to…um…doze off. What can I say? It was dark, the room was warm, and my art history prof had such a deep, soothing voice.

If you are just joining our story, you can read the rest of the episodes to date here!

I have this strange sense of deja vu…

Meanwhile, in the technical labs of The Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire, we are working on several exciting developments, which we will alert you, our faithful readers in the next week or so. But we will FIRST alert those who have signed up for our mailing list (which you must admit, does not overtax your inbox!) So, if you want to be the first to know what there is to know, you best get over there and sign up to be on our newsletter list.

But wait, you cry! How do I do that? There is a sign-up link near the top of the right hand column, that says Get even More Pandas, and by signing up, you will get my email newsletter whenever I get around to send it. No News? No email. and you can banish pandas from your inbox any time you choose. Huzzah! Do it now as there will be some very cool news heading your way next week.

We would be remiss if we didn’t congratulate Princess Pinky on her exciting win over a whole bunch of kinda important icons in the Smithsonian Smackdown this week. If you thought she had a good opinion of herself before this, wait till you see her pinky-self now! Hooboy. Good luck Mei Xiang. Your little princess is going places!

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

What a Fabulous Furry Friday It Is…

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Today, Fabulous Furry Friday brings you more Great Moments in History! Today is the 40th anniversary of Richard M. Nixon’s resignation from the presidency, as a result of, well, some really bad stuff he did. But as much as we might like to think otherwise, we do have a few things for which to thank old Tricky Dick , the most important being….

Hello? Pandas?????

The first “official” pandas that came to live permanently in the USofA

And while we are talking pandas and politics, a faithful reader and supporter sent me a link to this story of a NY Congressional representative who is going trolling for pandas (and perhaps votes?) on the extremely long recess that Congress is now on. Feast your eyes on this editorial on the NYC-Panda question.

And then, of course, the first men walked on the moon during Nixon’s first (and only completed) term:

One step for a small bear….

But the Watergate burglars had nothing on the panda kindergarten!

“What did dey knows, and when did dey knows it?” Fuggedabout da %7^$## tape!

And who says panda satire isn’t educational?

Meanwhile, yet another alert reader told me that today is national Cat Day. frankly, it feels like every day is cat day around my house, but what do I know? Mehitabel is celebrating the day by relaxing with a good book:

What cats are reading at the beach this summer!

Meanwhile, if you haven’t already done so, don’t waste another second without checking out my latest books, Pandamorphosis and The Panda Chronicles Book 4: the Book of Wu! (Mebbe you might want a copy for your very own!)

Well, we’ll see you all next week. Um..is this conversation being taped?

Be the Bear,
Bob T. panda

Fabulous Furry Friday returns!

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Friday already? Where does the week go? There has been lots going on and much of it has been stories from the real world, that make us wonder how the human race has survived for this long. (And you thought pandas were endangered!)

Not only have people been taking selfies in perilous situations, apparently some people have torched their homes in their attempts to kill spiders or get rid of snakes. One fire official commented, “Fire is not the method to use to kill spiders.” You can be sure that the investigative team here at The Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire will be looking into this.

For now, let’s revisit some of the …um..questionable situations the panda kindergarten has gotten into.

the year of the dragon, panda kindergarten

Huzzah! it’s the year of the Dragon!

What do you mean by “was?”

Always read the directions…

have a great weekend, and remember, be careful while taking selfies!

Be the Bear,
Bob T. Panda

The Panda Chronicles

This is Your Brain, This is Your Brain on Pandas!

Tag Archives: Institute for contemporary panda satire

Welcome to 2015 at The Panda Chronicles!

On the 10th, 11th, and 12th Day of Crisp-Moss:

And now, The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire presents:
The 12 Days of Crisp-Moss!!!!!

Once more with feeling….And a Pinky in a Hemlock Tree!

FII-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE CUPPYCAAAAAAAAAAAKES!

On the 7th day of Crisp-Moss…

On the 7th day of Crisp-Moss, My panda cam did see…

FII-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE CUPPYCAAAAAAAAAAAKES!

31 Days of Pandas Returns!

Fabulous Furry Friday Presents…

Pandas Celebrate Banned Books Week

The Literature of the Panda?????

GET EVEN MORE PANDAS

Pandas: Masters of the Pregnant Paws

Inspector Panda immersed in Art

What a Fabulous Furry Friday It Is…

Fabulous Furry Friday returns!

And now, The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire presents: The 12 Days of Crisp-Moss!!!!!

Once more with feeling….And a Pinky in a Hemlock Tree!

FII-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE CUPPYCAAAAAAAAAAAKES!

On the 7th day of Crisp-Moss, My panda cam did see…

FII-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-VE CUPPYCAAAAAAAAAAAKES!

The Literature of the Panda?????

GET EVEN MORE PANDAS

And now, The Institute of Contemporary Panda Satire presents:
The 12 Days of Crisp-Moss!!!!!