Tag Archives: Mehitabel

Sunday Funday Salutes…Our Pandas to the North

As if the global pandemic was not enough pain for those of us in North America, the Canadian pandas are going to be going back to China. Their bamboo, which is about 99% of their diet, comes from China, flown in every couple days (or is it once a week? I can’t remember and I am too lazy to look it up.) has been hard to come by, what with the flight reductions during the pandemic.  Most pandas have a preference for the bamboo they like to eat, and even if the US and Canada weren’t having their own problems, you can’t switch out Seattle boo for Chengdu boo, no matter how convenient that would be.

So, Er Shun and Da Mao are heading back to China, much to our dismay.

Meanwhile, HWMNBN continues to throw tantrums, tell lies about the scope of the pandemic and I’m guessing, will be tweeting up a s**tstorm after the inspiring speech that President Barak Obama gave at the Virtual Commencement on Saturday. It was nice to be reminded what someone with empathy and intelligence sounds like.

But it’s Sunday and that means it’s time for some pandamonium! Let’s look back at the ‘toons about the Canadian pandas and the place they held in the world of Panda Satire!

Pinky and the Twinkies, eh?

“If Pinky is grounded, can I have her dessert?”

What do you mean you left a note saying they are at my house?

Bubba is having so much fun with his new friends!

Hey! Where did Bubba and Mr. Bun go?

Hey! watch where you put that torch!

It’s a good thing that Pinky taught Bubba how to use Skype!

Packing is such a chore! And a surprise visit from a friend can make it go so much faster!

long goodbye

The Long Goodbye, or “Toronto Farewell”

our story

Mommee pandas have laser vision. Don’t even think you can hide, Bubba.

There’s always time for another cupcake!!!

So THAT’S how Pinky got there so quickly!

I wonder what this button over here does….AAAAAHHHHHHHH!

 

By the way, it sounds like masks are shipping over at Redbubble! If you need some masks, wouldn’t you breathe a little easier if they had pandas on them?

Be(e) the Bear!
Bob T Panda

I Can Only Reach This Conclusion:

They want to kill us!!!!

Consider this evidence:
Rollback of environmental regulations
Rollback of work safety standards
Breaking the promise of a path to citizenship for DACA registrants
Imprisoning desparate migrants in inhumane conditions
Rollback of food safety inspections
Continued attempt to end the Affordable Care Act and the protections for those with pre-existing conditions

And that was all before the Coronavirus Pandemic…

Nooz Flash: “president” Mittens has tested negative for having any compassion at all.

Need a felty support panda? Visit the Buy Stuff With Pandas page and place your order!

Be the Bear!
Bob T panda

The “Best” of Mittens…

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahhahahhhahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahhahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Whew! I needed that.

As we know, there is nothing “Be best” about Mittens. As one of the panda faithful on #PandaTwitter said, “We need you to keep making fun of Mittens so that we can keep our sanity.*”

*Or something like that.

So let’s climb into the wayback machine and revisit some of our ‘toons that reveal just what kind of cat Mittens is. (spoiler: he’s a bad cat)

It is too much to BEAR!

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

“You are all Losers!” – Mittens the Cat

Pinky is beginning to look positively presidential!

“This is not a loser tail!!!!!”

Poof!

And so it began…

March

Whats a protest without pandas?

happening

Are all these paper clips mine?

Memorial day

Don’t be endangered, be dangerous

Clear as mud!

Things are about as real as they can get.

Well, that’s about all of Mittens we can stand this week. Tune in next Sunday for more of Mittens’ crimes against humanity! Remember, laughing is a great form of resistance. If we quit laughing, the reign of terror has won. Don’t let him win and vote the bums out in November!

Keep panda-ing on!
Bob T Panda

Who’s ready for TIGERS????

We have many animal friends here besides pandas and (some) cats: koalas (Kevin) grizzly bears (Frank and Mikey), elephants, and even groundhog Punxatawney Phil made an appearance, but once in a while…

There will be TIGERS!

You all remember that story a month or so ago, when the Bronx Zoo reported that several of their tigers tested positive for COVID19, right?

Of course, ZooNooZ got the scoop!

I’ve been waiting for weeks to use this joke…

Panda Commerce Update!

I just posted some new designs over at my Panda Chronicle Shop on Redbubble, and you might want to check them out. Eventually I hope to add these designs to fabric over at another artist “products on demand” site for textiles and linens, but for now, they are available on several products at Redbubble.

BTW, some people asked if I would be making Pinky masks and I probably mumbled something noncommittal, BUT, the folks at Redbubble must have been getting lots of questions about this, because they gave the artists a heads up so we could set up some masks with our designs so when they launch, they’ll all be ready to go!

UPDATE!!! Masks have LAUNCHED! Just head over to my home page at Redbubble, look for the design you like and see if there is a mask available. It didn’t work for every design, but there are masks with all the following designs, as well as some with larger images of Pinky, Bubba, Bee, and Mr. Wu!

Meanwhile, feast your eyes on these…

Beeeeeeeeeeee!

Bubba, two ways! Don’t call mee boo boo!

Nobody expects the panda kindergarten!

Surely you didn’t think I’d forget Pinky, did you?

I included all four of the designs on socks, as well as the soon to be released masks, as well as several other products in their catalog.

You’re welcome!

Panda on!
Bob T Panda

We are ALL Concerned…

WE knew that the Minch McTurtle led Senate would not vote to remove HWMNBN, even though all the evidence pointed its tiny fingers at him. For me, this unwillingness to look reality squarely in the face and do what needed to be done, verged on cruelty when certain Senators made statements leading one to think that maybe they were on the fence, and could be persuaded to do the right thing.

And now…and now…he is floating the idea that maybe the scientist should look into the idea of using household cleaning disinfectants (“Hey! Everybody has some!”) and strong UV light to “disinfect the body” For the record, this is a bad idea that will kill you, or at the very least make you wish you were dead. And then he gave another press conference to say he was “being sarcastic”.

But at least we got to see Brad Pitt play Dr. Fauci on SNL

And now, without further much ado about the end of civilization (which is not nothing…)

Everyone. Knew.

Washi Tape Has Arrived!

Did I mention Washi Tape has arrived? Check out the Buy Stuff With Pandas page to see how to order it!

Here is a picture of the actual tape!

Panda ON!
Bob T Panda

What Day is it, Anyway

You might think that someone who has worked in her home studio for over 30 years would be able to remember what day it is, but I am having a hard time with that. Yes, I work in my studio every day, but there are regular activities that I engage in, and as most of those aren’t happening, it gets kind of hard to figure out what day it is.

Fortunately, the Whidbey Island Organic Farm School has started up  production, even if their students are not able to be there yet. If you are on Whidbey Island, you’ll know we have a wealth of small organic farms growing wonderful food. Since the farmers markets won’t be opening any time soon, if at all, sales opportunities (i.e. how they actually make enough money to keep going) are extremely limited. If you can, check with your favorite farmer where ever you live, and see if you can get a CSA share. It will keep the farmers working, and you’ll get fresh vegetables that actually taste like something, other than vaguely green.

And now, let’s have some Pandas! One can only eat so much healthy food! Bring on the cuppycakes!

Keeping you safe from evil cuppycakes….

yoga for pandas

All salute the sacred cuppycake!

What makes a panda run? Cuppycakes, of course!!!!

Legalize cake today! Prevent illicit cuppycake activities.

inspector panda and cuppycake pushers

Inspector Panda says, “Know the signs of cuppycake dependency”

pandas in the laboratory

Can you calibrate the cuppycake?

I have extra frosting!

If I have but one life to live, let me give it for a cuppycake.

Gimmee!

Washi Tape Has Arrived!!!!

I have about 45 more sets of Washi Tape available at $20 for a set of 4 rolls of 4 different designs. If you have a pending felty panda order (Either through Kickstarter or from this website) and would like to add a set, I can add them to your order with no additional shipping costs. See the Buy Stuff with Pandas page for ordering information. If you are trying to figure out what Washi Tape is and what you can do with it, this site is a good place to start!

Here is a picture of the actual tape! Tape is about 1.25″ wide and a roll is 10 meters of tape.

Wands up, everyone! It’s getting pretty scary out there.

Panda On!
Bob T panda

It’s Sunday! Who’s having a Funday?

Sigh…

Could we have just ONE day without further assaults on democracy, the rule of law, or our sanity? Apparently not. HWMNBN has been inciting right wing groups to protest at state capitols to “liberate” the states from the unfair shutdown. What’s a few less grannies and school kids? If it wasn’t for the fact that, given statistical probability that someone at this event is pre-symptomatic with COVID19 and that multiple people attending will then bring the virus home to their own communities, I’d say let them infect each other. But I’m not that irresponsible.

I’m staying home (mostly) and washing my hands, being careful on those rare occasions I do need to go out, and hope you are too! I need all the readers I can get! BTW, if you’re not reading Heather Cox Richardson’s excellent essays, you really should! She brings a historian’s perspective to our current national crisis, and while she doesn’t pull her punches, she manages to give me hope as well. If you read nothing else (beside my ‘toons, of course) reading these would tell you everything you need to know to exist in today’s world.

So let’s sit back and watch (okay…read) this encore presentation of Kitty Sue and the 3 Pandas! (By popular request!)

story

This story seems a little, but not entirely, familiar!

pandas

What a perfectly charming cottage! I wonder who lives there…

kittysue

In a cabin in the woods…

commercial

These guys are so full of themselves!

pandas

unhand…um…unpaw that cuppycake!

what fresh horror

…and she ate the just right cuppycake all up!

boundary issues

unauthorized search and seizure is SOOOO tiring!

sleepy

UNHAND MR. BUN THIS INSTANT!

episode

Is this episode exciting? you bet it is!

discovery

The discovery of the terrible crime in the pandas’ house…

And now, for some alternative facts!

kidding

Pandas are very misunderstood, in so many ways….

pandas

What a lovely day for the 3 pandas to relax at home!

We hope you enjoyed this Encore Presentation of KittySue and the 3 Pandas! A reminder that you can find this story in Book 8 of the Panda Chronicles collections: The Pinky Defense! Get the whole set!

Panda on!
Bob T Panda

There Will Be Tigers

Disturbing news…I mean NooZ… came from the Bronx Zoo this week, when it was discovered that at least one of the tigers and several lions had contracted COVID-19, probably from one of the keepers who was asymptomatic. (This is a correction from earlier when I said it was the Woodland Park Zoo with the plague-ridden tigers. I think I confused a news story I read later, because the WPZ was checking their big cats for COVID 19 infections after the Bronx Zoo news.) This has troubling implications, for owners…I mean servants of domestic cats. It is unknown whether it could be passed back and forth from you to your cat, so you might want to wash your hands after playing with Mr. Kitty and refrain from kissing your cat on the lips. I don’t know anyone who might have done this. 🙄

While we wait for the Woodland Park Zoo tiger to have his interview on ZooNooZ, I’ve assembled some of the previous appearances of tigers here at The Panda Chronicles. But first, I wanted to share a video sent to me by a friend of panda satire!

We have had all too much disturbing news, and more comes across our screens every day. All too often I find myself riding the downward spiral into despair that life will ever return to normal. Every trip to Twitter-land reveals heartrending stories of love and loss, but also uplifting stories of hope and kindness. While I will never quit poking at injustice and moronic anti-leadership, I want to make sure what we roll with is not all rant! Pandas are fun and light and love, after all (just ask the Hong Kong pandas! “What do you MEAN have I seen youtube???”)

So, before we enjoy tiger palooza, I share this video sent to me by one of the friends of the panda kindergarten. Make sure you take note of the socks at the 1:31 and 1:42 time stamps!

And now, let’s get up close and personal with tigers!

Much better to take a selfie with pandas!

You know we’re just kidding about this, right?

I really had no idea what she was up to.

I think we need some more encore presentations of Pinky’s last run for the White House, don’t you?

There were no tigers involved in this plan, so it must be okay, right?

Aren’t you already in enough trouble, Pinky?

Pinky enlists her brother's help in her scheme

“Just run along and put these brochures where people will see them!”

You knew Mommee was going to get angry, didn’t you?

And remember, if we stop laughing, the terrorist has won. Stay safe, stay home, wash your hands (with soap and water, don’t just lick them!) and vote in November!

Panda on!
Wands up, everyone!
Bob T Panda

 

The Rules are not for Us

Do as we say, not as we do. Why does that seem to be the subtext for all that the party currently in charge of the WH does and says? Will the latest examples of unlawful behavior be held to account? Seems kind of doubtful to me. But what do I know? I am only a poor little panda.

But now for the NooZ!

I just can’t even.

Panda on!
Bob T Panda

It’s Sunday *gulp* Funday!

While the news makes it feel more like Sunday, Bloody Sunday instead of Sunday Funday, here at The Institute for Contemporary Panda Satire, we are dedicated to bringing you fun with pandas!

A quick note: We are ready to start taking orders for more felty pandas! All the information can be found on the Buy Stuff With Pandas page, which you can find right here! You can also order the first group of Panda Chronicle themed Washi tape!

Pinky is a Star (not to mention a icon) and she is ready to be your emotional support panda…well, if you let her be president she will! Wearing her signature tutu and her tiara, Pinky is ready for you to grant her all her wildest dreams. hey! This is Pinky we are talking about. You didn’t think she was here to serve you, did you?

But now, let’s jump into the panda way-back bus and see what encore presentations there are for your Sunday relaxation!

Oh dear….are you going to leave her there?

There must be cake!

Is this any way to treat our Nation’s most adorable icon?

The forces of Meihem are only barely in check.

But at least Pinky didn’t FLUNK CAKE!!!!!

“Oh yeah…dere MIGHT be one or two other pandas in it, but I can’t remember who.”

Never say “no” to Pinky!

And it was ever thus….

Meihem, not Mayhem.

Well, they did hang their coats up.

Introducing Princess Dumpling

Wait a minute…triplets??????

We hope you enjoyed a completely Mittens free Sunday! I sure needed that and I bet you did too! Don’t forget to check out the new line up on the Buy Stuff with Pandas Page!

Panda on!
Bob T Panda